Posts tagged ‘sick’

March 19, 2012

Try Lucid Dreaming they said. It will be fun they said.

So Spring Break is now over and now all I have left is just that last push of a few painful months until I can finally enjoy some time away from school. The finish line is so close…but there’s just so much that’s going to be taking place in the next few months that the stress is really getting to me. What I will be doing in the future depends on the outcome of the few weeks to come. Anyways, with that being said, I haven’t been feeling too well lately.

I haven’t really been myself recently either, which I’m definitely kicking myself for (haven’t really said the smartest things in the last few days)…probably too much cough syrup haha. Yea, I’ll just go with that. Cough Syrup…yum. And I hate the notion of being drowsy all the time.

So I’ve been reading some articles on lucid dreaming and thought “Wow, maybe being able to control your dreams would be a pretty neat thing!” Now I really have no idea what lucid dreaming is and what it entails. I am absolutely not an expert with this kind of stuff and I probably should have just left it at that. I really should have left it at that. I really should have.

What I thought lucid dreaming would be like...

Anyways, I was feeling really tired after my classes and had the opportunity to take about an hour long nap. Being the foolish opportunist that I am, I decided that this would be a perfect chance to try to have a lucid dream of myself. Make myself the hero, you know that kind of thing. Now for this sort of thing I guess you’re supposed to lay on your back and relax until you ultimately fall asleep. The thing is I never really knew when I did fall asleep.

My room was dark to start with, nearly pitch black and I could hear all of the noises around me. The noises coming from the house. Water in the pipes. The wind blowing around my window. That kind of stuff. And since I was laying on my back I had a clear view of my door. Now if you haven’t caught on from previous posts, I don’t really enjoy the company of my roommates (but that’s another story…) Anyways I could faintly make out my door being opened very slowly and saw a shadowy figure, what I made out to be my roommate, walking towards my bed. I was about to get pissed really fast since he didn’t knock first of all, and I felt a prank coming on. The thing was all I could do was watch. And as the figure slowly came closer to my bed I noticed that he was holding something in his hand.

I could see him coming closer and I attempted to say something, anything to let him know that the gig was up. That I could see what he was up to. But no sound came from my voice. And I still couldn’t move. I began to panic as I couldn’t figure out what the hell was going on. All the while the figure kept coming closer to my bed, creeping ever so slowly. As it was right on top of me that’s when I broke awake in a cold sweat.

I took in a deep breath of air, since I must not have been breathing the whole time. My mouth had the faint taste of copper, of blood. My room was still dark. The door was closed, as I had left it. But what the fuck, I could’ve swore that my roommate was in my room…

I walked out into the hallway then went upstairs only to realize, to my horror, that nobody was home. Everything was dark. Everything was the same as it had been since I got home, so no one could’ve stopped by and left while I was ‘sleeping’.

I can’t exactly explain what happened. All I know is that I wasn’t dreaming and that I was still in my room. Everything was or felt real and talking about it now still terrifies me. Whatever was in my room was not my roommate. And I now wonder what it was that it was holding in it’s hand. I looked more into lucid dreaming and there’s another associated phenomena known as Sleep Paralysis. That’s the only conclusion that I can get as to what I was experiencing. I have never been more happy to have woken up from a dream before, but I still am not sure if I can breathe a sigh of relief yet. I have never had a dream that real, that horrifying, with the inability to move or do anything about it as it was about to happen. One thing’s for sure though…I won’t be messing with things that I’m not sure of. And I have to stop reading scary things before going to bed. Oh, and pardon my language…still shaken. But not stirred! (…and that was lame; once again the blame goes to the cough syrup)

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